Most of my adult life i've been lurching from one moment to the next, always leaning and looking forward. As a child I was immersed in every moment as it arose. Something changed, and not necessarily for the better.
Have you ever caught yourself in that "waiting" energy? It feels like you want to just jump into the future.. to that point where you are at the cashier instead of three customers deep in line, or you have secured that deal instead of sitting with that lingering anxiety of it pending. The problem with this state is that we are essentially sacrificing any pleasure or insight we could reap from the present moment as we reach our arms out for the next. And life is short.. these chunks of time add up.
What if we could catch ourselves waiting, and instead of grasping forward, lean back into the now? The future will come without our assistance or worry, the present is in our company ready to be engaged. This unique pandemic time is an opportunity to cultivate a practice of stopping the plodding, grasping mind.. just hitting pause on that and asking, "What is true right now?"
The uncertainty of the future will never fade no matter how hard we plot and plan, however, there is instant certainty in the now. Are you safe right now? Are you healthy? Is there food in the fridge? Can you smile? Is the sun shining or the moon glowing? Do you have someone who cares for you? Do you care for yourself? All these answers are attainable right now.
So how do you come back to the now? Meditation is by far the best tool. You don't have to believe anything whacky or unsubstantiated to meditate. You just have to train your mind like you would train your body for physical capability. The training ultimately comes down to this: Can you come back to awareness, surfacing out of the sea of thoughts? A "yes" is your first rep of the weight, or your first tiny run. Eventually you'll progress to coming back over and over again... multiple reps and sets.. running 5 miles without stopping.
To get through this thing mentally healthy we need to put some tools to work, and this is one of the best tools you can have in the shed. So... right now.. take a big inhale... look up from the screen.. and as you slowly breath out feel the environment around you. Feel what's happening inside you. Ask, "What is true now?"
I'm Jonathan Legg
The road has been my greatest teacher.. challenging stagnant beliefs, disarming prejudices, and developing understanding of others. I hope the content on this blog will bring a sliver of that juju to you.